A Friday Evening

In a long time, I have never spent an evening like the way I did last Friday. In a cozy restaurant, typical of a romantic dinner setting in a Maniratnam movie, four hot girls and one pregnant lady spoiled the quiet dinner for a few lonely firangi guests and a couple of couples that had chosen to dine in that star diner that day. Thankfully I was one of the girls and not one of the other guests :)

This place we had chosen was about 2 minute drive from where I live. So the friends came over for a quick chai and chitchat. We did consider ditching the dinner for some in-house order in party, but we decided against, because we did not want any husband to enter his home and ruin the gals-indulgence.

The restaurant had lovely décor, amazing ambience (for us), and scrumptious slices of pizza, delicious desserts and mediocre main course. However the highlight of the evening was not the food per se, but the never ending entertainer in the form of S speaking three different dialects of Tamil that R did not get a word of, and yet laughed. I think I was too awestruck to even laugh, J was crying from the laughing and as Sh did not want to upset her make up, she held herself from laughing and crying. Holding that thought, was that the highlight or was it the “P” language that S, Sh and J spoke like that was their mother tongue leaving R and I in the dark? Am not quite sure. Or was it really the pizza that the pregnant lady had for starters, main course one and main course two? Or was it all the giggles of the happy girls that drove the rest of the guests away?

But in the end it was truly one of the nicest evenings gals!

Ladies - do you agree?

This is a thought that I have been meaning to pen down for a long long time. Today I had another trigger. So here I go.

There is a growing certain kind of women- the kind that’s not too hung up on coy, demure and small feet.

So what has been the best present you have got from your husband/fiancé? Responses have changed from expensive sarees, gorgeous necklaces, chocolate covered strawberries (well, one can never really resist those), surprise romantic trips to the more empowering ones. By empowering ones, I mean the ones that give you ‘wings to fly’ (in one of my friends’ own words). Like a GPS for the direction challenged wife, support to pursue a hobby or a profession for wives that weren’t exactly headed that way, new gym gears to keep up the motivation etc. Well you get the drift?

Well, I do agree that one needs to go silly and crazy and indulge once in a while. You would be considered boring otherwise ;) After all, no one gifts their girl friend a GPS on their third date, whereas chocolate and strawberries would be in. However in long standing relationships, IMHO, the need to feel empowered outweighs the need to feel pampered.

Well, would you agree?

We always see men in top positions. Of course there are more women now than earlier holding powerful seats in the corporate world. What is disheartening is, a man thats successful in his career is probably successful in his personal life too. He has a family, many times more than one kid and a posh home in the a scenic locality and a wife thats takes care of the big family.

However more often than not, a woman who is successful career is often left with a couple of divorces or a stalemate single life or single parenting a couple of kids. Is it because men can balance work-life better than women can or is it because partners are more supportive of a husband's career than a wife's career? :)

So the empirical fact is that women have to work twice as hard (or harder) to get to the same position that she would be if she were a man or end up in a broken personal life. The intertwined and complex unwritten rules around the role of a wife, mother and more so of a daughter-in-law does not leave any room for spending time and energy shaping up a professional life – but at this point, I should also mention that women are simply, point black - more capable people.

From what I see, she is endowed with a special sense of balance that can be observed in all her actions. When she feels empowered her man is scared that she would not need him anymore. When the traditional roles played by a man of being a provider and protector are challenged, he is worried if he was becoming dispensable in the household. More often than not, it is not lack of time on her part that lends herself to broken relationships and ineffectiveness at work, but it is a self-conscious choice of trying of boost her man’s ego that makes her a contended (I mean truly satisfied) home maker or a simple supportive wage earner.

Haven’t we seen her cook elaborately for the family and yet eat the left-overs truly happily? She finds the best pleasure possible in feeding a hungry tummy in her husband and kids. It is delight to be a great cook and bliss to be appreciated for her efforts. She seemingly effortlessly observes fasts for the wellbeing or simply a promotion at work. Doesn't she encourage you to raise from rock bottom to cloud nine, even if it had to include many smooth lies?!

What about the selfless love and the sleepless nights? What about the hurried and tired she sweating in the kitchen to make your favorite bajji when you got back from work? What about the tired reproach when she picks up your dirty socks and used clothes from the restroom, verandah and half-eaten lunch boxes from inside your bag? What about she effortlessly handing over the exact same receipt that you were searching for two hours? What about creating a place that you would love to call home? She created the balance in you by balancing everything from her wishes to his, from her reasons to his and from her intellect to his lack of pluck.


I celebrate womanhood whether she is in the backyard or the boardroom for everything was a choice.

You know where to send the Thank You note if you have / had a lovely place called your home !