Instance 1:
Where: X standard class room - History class in session
When: Sep 1995
Scene: The topic of discussion is reservation policy. The teacher is lecturing about why and how reservation policy was started in India. He is talking about why it is still in existence today – about the game of politics around it, about the reality of how well the policy is used or abused.
Now:
She can not seem to agree on how only a certain section of people could get critical benefits just by virtue of being born in a particular community. She does not find any reasoning pertinent to the present situation. She is not bothered about how it was ‘useful’ 50 years earlier when it was put in place, but certainly she feels it was a joke that had no benevolent relevance today. She feels cheated. At 14, in her animosity towards the Government, towards the people that make rules she hurls away her spite in words. She feels so powerless just to be taking on her teacher. After the class, she realizes her actions were futile and that her behavior was at best childish. At the end of the class, her teachers talk to her about her thought process, the truth in her reasoning, and the wasted energy in class. She is ashamed for her actions but she is convinced her logic and rationale was right. She certainly feels let down – a let down of an entire community.


Instance 2:
Where: Railway ticket counter, Mambalam, Madras
When: 1998 February
Scene:
She is standing in a queue that’s at least 10 people long before her and at least a 10 more behind her. There are almost 10 such lines. She has some work outside of that railway station. All of them are definitely busy or at least none of them are particularly enjoy the sweltering heat and the long lines.
Now:
Our hero, a well dressed 20-something man tries to push through the queue, get ahead of others in the line to get tickets. She gets extremely furious. Agreed, that he is not doing a heinous crime, but she feels cheated. A very daily misdemeanor that someone does everyday. But that’s no explanation. She cannot take it. She gets violent with words at him. At first, she says – “Hello Sir, It’s a queue. Please enter the line (showing the end)”. It does not seem like he is paying any attention. With a louder voice she repeats – “Hello Sir, Can you hear me? I said we are not fools here waiting in the line. Show some manners.” He turns around, makes some eye contact and proceeds with pushing the people again. She cannot take it any longer. She pats him on the back – grabs his attention and says – “Now will you please get away from here or shall I call the Superintendent of the station?” Now he is almost mocking at her. There are people buzzing in a hushed tone, some talking about her audacity and some trying to appease her and some trying to get him away. She reiterates “Move away, I am not going to let you get away with this”. Now there are more people talking. More and more physically making sure he is moved away from the line; many speaking ill of the man and many more trying to pacify the girl. Though he was gone, she feels unsure and jittery of herself. She could feel her blood boil, her tension mounting and suddenly she feels very conscious of herself. She talks no more until she cycles back home and recounts the episode. Everyone at home reprimands her; no one really approves her behavior. They teach her to be patient, to behave like a ‘girl’. She is just not convinced. She was sure that she would have felt worse had she let him cheat on her.

That is the real ‘She’, today her outward reaction may be different because of the certain cultural/civility influences, but inside she is still the same person. Patience has muted her, time has mellowed her; powerless sometimes, weak and incapable, she cannot take cheating in her stride. She believes, cheaters showcase scant respect for the cheated. There are people who cheat at all levels – right from the grassroots like the ones trying to jump the queue to the ones like self-proclaimed avatars that take an entire generation for a ride. It’s hard to witness the ones getting cheated, harder to get cheated and worst staying voiceless in times of such controversy. Conmen exist only as long as people are weak and fragile. Please wake up, recognize the cheaters and whip your share.